In a follow up to my previous post in which life coach Martha Beck discusses what our Essential Self is vs. our Social Self, the next part of the interview was a true AH HA moment…
Martha explains ‘Square One’ : “As humans we believe that we are supposed to start our lives small with little knowledge, then we get progressively more knowledgeable and intelligent as we get older until we die.” Martha says “Other cultures see the entire process of life as cyclical. ” So just as seasons change, nothing in nature ever stays the same, there is always growth.
She continues,” Your going along in life and then there will be an event that causes a significant change not just in the details of your life but in your very identity- like a job change or career change. At that point you go back to kindergarten, you become a beginner all over again. Without being willing to jump into a brand new -“I don’t know what I am doing” , you will never make significant changes. You have to go through the period of not knowing what you are doing, then you go through squares 2-4.”
These next squares she compares to ” a Caterpillar that goes into a cocoon and what it does in there is it melts down. It doesn’t just grow wings, it melts into a puddle. That is what happens to us in square one. Then when it is all melted it triggers a chemical reaction that starts restructuring a whole new creature, a totally different creature out of those same cells. A version of that happens to us as we go through every change in our lives.”
In order to embrace change we need to learn to sit with it , to sit with the un-comfortableness! Let’s take some pressure off and stop believing we have to know all the answers, maybe the secret is embracing where we are and looking for what we can learn in our present situation? Just as the seasons change, so do our moments, and before we know it we will be in the next moment in our lives.
Life is an ocean of motion, so enjoy every precious moment, embrace the stillness before it changes and try not to control every situation. Ask questions, be curious and be thankful that we get to learn every day.